Fleisser - It’s your life!

We may think our current life is the best. It will always continue like what we have today without anything bad happen.

Unfortunately, thing may not go like what you want to sometimes. You may have to do some preperation before the worst thing happen.
Read the rest of this entry »

Sometimes we just live our live the way it goes. We don’t plan it, we don’t schedule it, we don’t make preparation of what to come. We just let our life flow without ever controlling it. This may sound like a good life, but it isn’t. This won’t make you succed.
Read the rest of this entry »

Listening is the other side of the conversation coin.

As a good listener, you must show that you’re truly interested to what other person talk about. The key to being an listener lies in making a sincere effort to absorb what that person is saying and feeling. Trying to understand what they say.

Listening is different from hearing. You may hear a cello as part of an orchestra, but when you actively listen to that same cello, you’re consciously focused on every note and absorbing the emotion. Read the rest of this entry »

Accept all compliments graciously. Do it simply. Do it directly. Avoid the temptation to be too modest or self-effacing. The standard two-word response to a com­pliment is “Thank you.” Then, if you choose to convert it into a conversation, go ahead and do so. A compliment with an interesting but less than gracious acknowledg­ment might go as follows:

“Marion, that’s a beautifully tailored skirt.”

“Thanks, I got it for six bucks down at the Salvation Army store.” Read the rest of this entry »

There are times when you find yourself suddenly thrust into the presence of someone who’s just too good to pass up. These delicious moments seem to coincide with the exact second that your brain freezes over and you go gaga: Help, what do I say? What do I do? Where shall I look? What will people think? Keep going with this line of self-questioning and you’ll get the sweats, a palpi­tating heart, a beet-red face and goofy body language.

The easiest of these situations is when the two of you are thrust together: sitting next to each other on a train, plane or bus; riding in an elevator; waiting in a Laundro­mat or the lobby of a hotel; working in adjacent booths at a trade show; or checking out the fruit to see if it’s ripe at the same counter at your local supermarket. In these situations, you already have quite a bit in common with which to work. Read the rest of this entry »

Conversation is how we open other people up to see what’s inside, to deliver a message, or both. And questions are the spark plugs of conversation. Be aware, however, that there are two types of questions: those that open people up and those that close them down. Ques­tions work with incredible ease and the results are virtu­ally guaranteed, so be sure you know which is which.

Here’s the difference. Open questions request an explanation and thus require the other person to do the talking. Closed questions elicit a “yes” or “no” response. The problem with closed questions is that once you’ve been given a response, you’re back where you started- and you’ll have to think of another question to maintain some semblance of conversation. Read the rest of this entry »

Well, this is it! You’ve just introduced yourself to someone new. You remember to open your body languange and keep your body, voice tone, and words all saying the same thing. You were first with the eye contact and first with the smile. You introduced yourself, and miracle of miracles- three seconds have gone by and you can still remem- ber the other person’s name. You’ve begun synchroniz- ing, and you feel confident that rapport is building. But now what? Read the rest of this entry »

Voice accounts for 38% of face-to-face communication. It reflects how a person is feeling; in other words, his or her attitude. People who are confused will sound con­fused, and people with a curious attitude will sound curious. You can learn to synchronize these sounds.

Tone. Notice the emotions conveyed by the tone of voice. Tune in to these emotions, get a feel for them and use the same tone. Read the rest of this entry »

As you already know, body language accounts for 55% of our communication. It is the most obvious, easiest and most rewarding feature to synchronize on your way to rapport.

Synchronizing body language falls into two loose groupings: matching, which means doing the same thing as the other person (she moves her left hand, you move your left hand), and mirroring, which means, as it implies, moving as if you were watching the other person in a mirror (he moves his left hand, you move your right). Read the rest of this entry »

Synchronizing attitude-or multiple congruity, to give it its scientific name-takes into account location and mood. It is also frequently supportive, as when a friend is challenged and you “take a stand” with him, or a par­ent deeply relates to a child’s problem with a class assignment, or you share the exhilaration your partner feels over a promotion. Read the rest of this entry »